Still Waiting to Begin Waiting

So where are we in our adoption process?

A lot of people has asked me variations on that question a lot lately.

We are still waiting to officially start waiting. We had our homestudy a month ago. Our caseworker wrote up the report but we weren't able to review it until we got back from New York at the end of October. So we reviewed it and made a few suggestions. Our caseworker updated the homestudy with our suggestions and then turned it into the agency, which will then go through it one last time.

We are waiting for agency to do their thing and then we will be officially "on the list." I've been working on my parent profile/birth mother letter so it can be ready when the agency is. The agency had a staff change recently and that's kind of holding things up. I am anxious to get it all completed, but I am also happy because the staff changes mean we get to work with the same program director who helped us during Jocelyn's adoption.

My emotions on this adoption are different from the last. I was going full-throttle to get our homestudy done last time. I was gung-ho about getting the nursery done. This time...I am just taking my time. I am not stressed or anxious. What's the difference? Am I less excited? I think not. I think maybe I have less nervous energy. Am I still nervous? Absolutely. Our last adoption was text-book perfect and I highly, highly doubt we will have so good again. But I am not scared. I don't feel as desperate as I did the first time around.

I am getting pretty baby hungry. I can't wait for more moments like these:

Getting the call that our baby is being born, packing the diaper bag and heading out!

First bath

Placement - officially ours!

Newborn naps

Finalization

Sealing day

We've been talking about starting the nursery after the holidays - sorry visitors, the guest room will soon be located in the basement. We have begun talking baby names. Joci prays for the new baby at her night time prayers. And when I ask her if she wants a baby brother or a baby sister, she says "baby sister" (as if she even knows what that means!). Justin says he thinks the next one will be a boy. I...well...I don't know. But I am excited, at peace, and calmly waiting.