Thursday, June 19, 2014

Joci's World 3

A couple weeks after Christmas, Joci couldn't find a few of her favorite books. She found her toy cell phone and "made a call."

"Hi, Santa. It's Joci. My princess books are lost. Can you bring me some?"

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Joci: What is God's last name?

Me: He doesn't have one.

Joci: Why not?

Me:...uh, I guess he doesn't need one.

She was not satisfied with that answer at all.


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I was combing Joci's hair after a bath and she was complaining about all the snarls and snags. "Stop it, Mom. You're making me bald!"


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I was changing Noelle's diaper and singing "Na na na na, don't play with my heart."
Joci repeated me (with a whole new melody of course), "Na na na na, don't play with Mommy's heart."
I laughed. Then she asked me what color my heart was. "Red," I answered.
"Just like Nathan's mom. My heart is pink."

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Sometimes in the morning Joci finds my cans of Diet Coke that are four-fifths of the way gone and will finish them off because I am bad and forget to throw them away. After drinking some Diet Coke on morning she said, "Pop makes magic in my tummy! And a kitty in my..." she thought for awhile, then proudly finished, "throat!"

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After a particularly "fun" day of stubbornness on both our parts, she said her evening prayers. "I know moms and dads get mad at kids sometimes. I don't like it. And I'm sorry for being sassy. But sometimes kids are sassy."


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As her fourth birthday approached, if I upset her by requesting she eat her dinner or pick up  her toys or take a bath, she would glare at me and say, "You don't get any birthday cake."


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Once when the moon was covered and distorted by a gauzy haze of clouds, Joci said, "Someone bashed the moon in!" 


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Joci's first testimony in primary: I would like to bare my testimony because I am smart.


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After her picking her up from Sunday school.
Joci: Today I learned about testimonies.
Me: Oh, that's great. What do you have a testimony about?
Joci: Cavities

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In church last week, Joci whispered to me, "If this is God's house, where is His bed?"


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As she was taking off her pants to get her pajamas on, she got frustrated that her underwear came off with them. "Ah! Why do my underwear always come off? I need underwear that doesn't come off. Does yours come off?"

I was close to making some comment about how my big derriere keeps my underwear up, but thought better of it. I never want to bash my body in front of my kids. So instead I said, "Mine stays on. I think it has more to do with the types of pants you have. Or maybe the shape of your bottom."

Joci said, "I have a circle shape. What shape do you have?"

Whenever I am not sure how to answer something, I think it's best to let kids answer their own questions. "What shape do you think I have?"

She stared at my behind for a very long time. "It's square."

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Joci's prayer tonight: Bless that the blessings will be good. That we'll die when we're supposed to. That babies come out when their supposed to.

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Today, I told all my friends about Satan!

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It was past Joci's bedtime but she wanted to sleep in my bed. I was watching a television show that would not have been appropriate for a 5 year old. But we made a deal - I would put on headphones if she stayed quiet. She wouldn't stay quiet so I kept shushing her, which upset her. She finally said, "When I'm a mom, I will NEVER watch bad shows that say bad words. I will only watch good shows. And my husband won't either. I will have the best husband ever."

making a chocolate sandwich because why not?

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